The Shift You Need: Recognizing and Releasing What Holds You Back

Brittany Khandoker
Jan 29
5 min read

This awakening is happening all around the world. People are demanding more from life. Turn off the noise of negativity, start weaving positive habits into your daily routine, and seek out your growth tribe. That might mean working with a coach, joining a health club, or simply reading books that expand your mind.

Who's "Should" Are You Following?

If you find yourself dangerously unhappy despite thinking you’re doing everything you “should,” it’s time to pause and reflect. Whose “should” are you following? Society’s? Your family’s? Your own outdated programming? Living your best life requires bravery and curiosity. The courage to sit with your own thoughts in silence and truly listen. If that seems to difficult, find someone you trust to sit with you while you explore your inner programming and what created it.

The Power of Meditation and Self-Awareness

Many people have no idea what they truly want in life because all their energy is focused on what they don’t want. Meditation is a powerful tool to access the subconscious mind, offering clarity and perspective.

When you breathe deeply, hold for seven seconds, and slowly release three times, you reset your nervous system and feed oxygen to your pineal gland, also known to some as the third eye and the higher self, enhancing your mental clarity and emotional balance. Without it, we often run on autopilot, following routines and habits programed into our subconscious mind - running in a loop.

You would be surprised to learn that most of your programming was installed as a young child, but why would you allow a child to make your adult decisions now?

Let’s say you’re one of the lucky ones - you know what brings you joy, and you dream of turning your passion into a business. Logically, your steps would include building a website, sourcing materials, or creating. Yet, without self-awareness, that same person might instead complain about a job they hate, swing by the liquor store or dispensary, grab fast food, and sink into old comforts. The autopilot mind whispers reasons why they “deserve” these distractions, and before they know it, years pass without real progress. You may as well have a 12 year old run your life.

Breaking the Cycle: Identify and Shift Your Habits

It’s time to wake up. Start noticing your habits and routines for what they are. If they aren’t serving your growth, make a commitment to change. Yes, you might lose friends who prefer the old version of you, but that creates space for those who will support your evolution.

Take weight loss as an example. Studies show that people in the same social circle often share similar body sizes and health habits. If someone struggling with weight intentionally surrounds themselves with active, health-conscious individuals, they are far more likely to adopt healthier habits and sustain them. Sometimes, a fresh start in a new city is necessary, but often, it’s simply about choosing different environments and relationships that align with your goals. That people pleaser in you might get upset with saying "no", but your future best self is your bigger more important "yes".

Open Your Mind to Growth

Instead of clinging to friendships that revolve around unhealthy habits - be open to new perspectives and opportunities. There are 8 billion people on earth, you will find your tribe. It's ok to not know something, you only have more to learn and evolve.

Accept that you don’t have all the answers, and embrace learning. Your free will gives you the power to listen with kindness and curiosity, leading you to a life that aligns perfectly with your unique soul.

Perhaps you’ve already acknowledged that certain people in your life drain your energy, yet you stay out of loyalty or a desire to help. But here’s a hard truth: No one can be “fixed” unless they recognize a problem themselves. It’s time to put on your own oxygen mask first, you can't fill someone else's cup if yours is empty. Change your life and welcome the curious to follow suit.

Take the First Step Today

Commit to doing one thing tomorrow that aligns with your joy. If you can’t think of anything, then it’s time to explore ways to cleanse negativity, uncover trapped emotions, and release old traumas. Find the lesson to lessen the pain. The key is in the lesson - when you find it, the emotional pain loses its grip, and the triggers begin to fade. Changing your memory focus changes the chemical reaction within your brain. Stress and fear trigger adrenalin and cortisol, while gratitude and empowerment trigger dopamine and serotonin. Choose to shift your focus, and you will rewire your brain for growth and resilience.

Here are some ways to help cleanse your mind and body of negativity and trauma so you can think clearer with more intuition:

Breathwork & Deep Breathing Exercises – Activates the parasympathetic nervous system, releasing trapped emotions. Deep long breath, hold for 7 seconds and slowly release. Do this three times for a reset.
Meditation & Mindfulness – Helps process emotions and detach from past traumas.
Journaling – Writing out thoughts can bring clarity and emotional release and get the subconscious mind on the same page and frequency.
Energy Healing (Reiki, Qi Gong, Pranic Healing) – Clears stagnant energy in the body.
Sound Healing & Binaural Beats – Frequencies help balance brain waves and emotional states.
Cold Showers & Hydrotherapy – Shocks the nervous system into resilience and stress relief.
Grounding (Walking Barefoot on Earth) – Reconnects the body with nature’s stabilizing energy.
EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique / Tapping) – Releases emotional blockages through acupressure.
Therapeutic Movement (Yoga, Tai Chi, Dance Therapy) – Encourages emotional flow and bodily release.
Sweat Therapy (Sauna, Exercise, Hot Baths) – Detoxifies stress hormones and trauma.
Affirmations & Neuro-Linguistic Reprogramming – Rewires limiting beliefs and replaces them with empowering ones.
Healthy Eating (Anti-Inflammatory Diet, Herbal Teas, Hydration) – Supports emotional resilience through nutrition.
Creative Expression (Art, Music, Writing, Crafts) – Converts pain into purpose.
Decluttering & Space Cleansing (Burning Sage, Feng Shui, Essential Oils) – Removes negative energy from your environment.
Laughter Therapy & Playfulness – Shifts emotional states and releases tension.
Spending Time in Nature – Promotes emotional detox and mental clarity.
Forgiveness Practices (Ho’oponopono, Shadow Work) – Releases resentment that blocks personal growth.
Seeking Support (Coaching, Therapy, Support Groups) – Helps reframe and process trauma in a healthy way. The key is in the lesson - when you find it, the emotional pain loses its grip, and the triggers begin to fade. Changing your memory focus changes the chemical reaction within your brain. Choose to shift to a positive focus, and you will rewire your brain for growth and resilience.